Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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