i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
