can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
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