haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
