It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I would fuck him just for his dog
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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