i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you