ya dads aren't the best wingmen
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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