Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Sorry about my life...
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize