im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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