There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
