imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
dude. I can hear the air.
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