I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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