wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
