You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize