I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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