you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize