my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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