Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
tonight lets celebrate not being married
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize