omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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