So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
