you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Four minutes until I can fart!
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
