Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
