Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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