i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
