I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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