BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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