his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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