time to smoke my breakfast
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize