Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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