apparently the secret to your success is patron
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
