heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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