the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
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