She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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