haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize