shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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