I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
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she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Come share oat with me in your robe
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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