We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
