Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
There r osticjed everywhere
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
