I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
He better not be in your backpack
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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