I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Randomize
