called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
