You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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