So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
