I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Michael Bay diarrhea
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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