i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
