Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
