Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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