You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
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He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
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One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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