Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day in three words: secret purse cake
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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