He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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