I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
