I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
